Working for Big Bad Wolf 2012

Date :3 Dec 2012 - 24 Dec 2012 3/12/12-5/12/12 This is the first time I work for a book fair ... not just any book fair but the biggest book fair in MALAYSIA!! The first 3 setting up day was the the worst day I had compare to all the part time job I had. From nothing we turn it into something was a challenging job. From setting the table to organizing the books on the table is not an easy job as we are facing 3 million of books from all around the world by many authors , genre , sizes and so on! We often change the place of the book and it is tiring as you have to put the book on and off the table trying to find space. Our feet and back suffer from endless pain... it is like your leg stepping on hundreds of needle. 6/12/12 Media day - nothing much - working for children book department - nothing much except parents , teens , children going nuts for the books and it got messy but we were told that it would get worst by tomorrow 7/12/12-9/12/12 Open 24 hours straight - 1st time saw people coming for books 1 am in the morning and on the weird hours where most of the people would be sleeping and having a sweet dream - work as counter this 3 days - encounter a lady customer that is rude and no manners. 10/12/12-13/12/12 Time back as normal - nothing much - helping parents to find for the books - recommend enid blyton story books which is a very good book and I used to read when I was little. 14/12/12-23/12/12 I could not stand the children department so I ask to go to general fiction to be with my friend and my request was granted. So from this day every single day I work there and I realise that this place is where I belong because I was happy working at fiction department rather than children's department as arranging book here is really relaxing as we are dealing with elder people which they would not make this place as messy as children department where you could not arrange it because it will turn back into messy in 1 min after I tidy it. I was able to smile a lot here and I was needed here by customer as they praise me for I often found the book they need or direct them to the right place for their book. I was even surprise when a lady praise for being very helpful and friendly and she told me that she came everyday for the past few days and was not able to find the book she wanted and after she meet me she can find most of the book... I replied her with my smile as a thank you for praising me. I was happy here along with my new fiction friends... we ate our lunch & dinner together in a group and help each other and chatting... this was the first time I feel like we are a family... We also help each other to find the books that they want and keep it under the table but unfortunately our luck is not always with us as there is a few time that the books we kept went missing... I am sure that the book we went missing were taken by the customer.. it is my first time experiencing customer who went under the table just to find for the books they want... 24/12/12 Today is the last day and we are setting down for this book fair... we work with a smile on our face but deep in we are kinda sad as we knew that we are going to be apart soon and not seeing each other for sometime or maybe forever ? I was kinda moody on that day but still I try to show them my best smile... We manage to finish it on 9 pm at night and we bid each other goodbye with hugs and flying kiss...I went for supper with them at a nearby mamak.

sudden thinking ... fear

I always think that I am capable of doing something such as getting good grades in my study ... seriously it is not easy ... I tried my best to study but it just cant get into my brain's memory ... when your family's hope all on you alone seriously it is a big and heavy burden ... Sometimes you will feel like giving up and rest ... I hate it when I was look down just because I get low marks on my exam unlike them who is genius or smart people who get good grade for their exams ... why on earth must we always compare the marks or grade ?? just because it is our human nature ?? It hurts when your college mate look down on you and look at you like you are the dummy and they think they know everything ... I hate those who discriminate people who are not that smart or slow learning people ... They don't have the right to discriminate people ... stop comparing please ?? I am so tired having to live within people who wear mask on their face all the time ... people who are nice and kind in front of you and back-stab you behind is the people you need to avoid ... I am surprise that some of them even smile towards you and talk to you like nothing happen and when you turn around they start to count all your bad habits or something that you didn't do but was accused of ... what I can say is be alert always =(

Falling in Love again is Painful but why i want to continue it ???

falling for someone again is painful .... i .. myself knew it ... but why am i falling for this trick again ?? i told myself not to like someone anymore ... but i just cant help it ... why is all this things always happen on me ??? why ?? he is damn famous among all the senior and junior ... everyone like him .... he is just like everyone's prince ... he have a good look , good education , good heart , and a gentlemen .... i know that i wont stand a chance for him to like me once cause i am not a pretty girl ... nor i am a girl with slim body .... i am not good at dance , singing , study , or anything ....to me the guy i like is like we are sky and earth .... i am sure he wont even look at someone like me ... someone like me doesn't exist in his eyes .... there is only one thing i can do ... that is like him secretly .... that is the best way .... as long as i can see him and he look happy than i am fine with it ...liking someone that you know you cant have hurts a lot ... it breaks your heart when you saw some pretty girl or other girl close to him ... talk to him .... sit his car .... hold his hand and more .... while you sit there and watch them happy while you lonely ... real lonely ....

Thinking about the Past

Many people dont agree on thinking about the past because they take it as a past issue and dont want to think about it anymore maybe because of some terrible issue or some unexpected misfortune issue they want to forget or erase from their memories .... as for me ... i don't think it is a bad thing thinking about the past as the past can give us a lot of learning about what we did the past is right or wrong ... and make it our lesson for the future or the history is about to happen again ... i miss my secondary school life and regret that i did not appreciate it ... now i realize that it is too late .... but i will take this as a lesson to learn and make things better so that i don't regret it future .... secondary school life was fun rather than college life because we don't need to think about world issue , working issue , money issue and many adultery issue as we only need to think about study issue and exam issue ... me myself used to fuss about getting up early in the morning at 5.30am for school but now i miss it ... i miss seeing my best friend at school and the time we had after school for activities .... i miss chatting with them at school ... the way we walk together , the way we went to toilet together ... the way we stick together ... but now everyone is busy with their college lifestyle ... barely able to keep in touch always ... i miss those days badly telling myself that the sweet days will never come again as those day is already past ... nothing can be made to change back to the past but anything can be make to change it in the future ...

National Service Time !! ( part 1 )

Time for National Service Time 3 January 2011 - 13 March 2011 , Kem Temasya Rimba Templer , Kumpulan 1 Siri 8/2011 , Company Charlie .

When i got the news of me going to participate in National Service at 2011 on july 2010 , i was shock and i cant accept it as my fate . The Fear of what is going to happen to me in that camp overwhelm me ... Day by day until that day !! 3rd Jan !! entering NS camp day ...

3 January 2011 - 13 March 2011

I woke up at 6.30 and clean myself . reminding that the day for me to enter NS camp at Rawang has arrived . feeling worry that i wont be able to follow the activities as i am not that kind of active people . i went to mines ktm and from there my friend and i took the ktm train to kajang and from kajang our church brother pick us up and send us to jalan reko kajang bus station bacause our NS bus will be waiting there to pick us up to our camp destination . our camp destination are different ... feeling lonely i went up to my bus and wondering who will sit next to me . It was a malay girl . well it didnt bother me ... the journey took about 1 hour to reach our camp site ... the bus stop and we got down and find our own luggage . then we were ordered to bring our own luggage to a room and put it there before lining up at the place the bus put us down . i saw my school friend that is my jimui ... at last got someone same camp with me ... 10 minutes later we were attend by 3 camp teacher to call for our name and divide us our dorm and company .... girls are called WIRAWATI and guys are called WIRA ... My company ??? Charlie of course ... dorm F ... all the register and procedures took us about 3 days before we divide into our own company to create our company flag , moto , vision , rules , songs and cheering .... They are 4 company that is Alpha , Bravo , Charlie and Delta . we complited our work in 1 week ...
Charlie = singa rimba , yellow
Our Charlie cheer is when our leader call CHARLIE we will shout HAUS !! ( thirsty in bm )
our Charlie song is

Singa singa pantang kalah ,
Walau sakit jatuh dan rebah ,
Bukan nak riak atau berlagak ,
Singa pasti juara ....

unexpected 0nes

16 0ct 2010,8am,Nilai driving center
> i met a guy there . . He started with a ''hell0 , have we meet bef0re ?'' i d0nt really kn0w what is he talking ab0ut . . He t0ld me that we have been in the same tuiti0n center . . It was f0rm 3 . . W0w . . It was 2 years ag0 . . And he t0ld me he remember me because i was tall and i n0rmaly sit infr0nt . . We began t0 chat . . . We exchange email and ph0ne number . . . We started t0 text each 0ther . . Bef0re he went back he sh00k my hand . . There is when i feel warmness . .

17 0ct 2010
> we meet again the next day . . . He text me . . He spy 0n me . . Haha . . . And i call him stalker ! XD . . I was w0rried that day . . He did n0t came near me but he texted me after he saw my face expressi0n . . He ask . . He make me feel like there is s0me0ne guarding me . . I feel happy . . . He is a caring guy . . . A guy that i have always h0pe f0r . . He left that day with0ut a face t0 face g00dbye . . .

19 0ct 2010
> it was 6.30am when i reach mcd0nald t0 have my breakfast . . I sat al0ne at the 2nd table fr0m the mcd0nald d00r . . I was eating pan cake ! I was sitting and playing my faceb00k until i saw s0me0ne familiar . . It was him . . He 0pened the d00r and came in . . . We l00k at each 0ther f0r a sec0nd bef0re he came t0 me and say that can he sit with me ? . . We did n0t talk much . . . It was my time t0 g0 when my agent came t0 pick me up . . S0 we say that we will met at the driving center . . I was the m0rning batch and i fail my driving test . . He 0n the 0ther hand is in the 2nd batch and he pass b0th ! He c0mf0rt me f0r my failure . . Aww . . He is caring . . . He text me . . C0mf0rting me the wh0le day . .

20 0ct 2010 0nwards . .
Things went sm00thly afterwards . . . We actually like each 0ther . . . We began t0 text m0re and everything went well f0r the next few days and it was my happy day . . . Until 0ne saturday . . I was at cinema watching The Perfect Wedding wìth my friend after we went t0 buy 0ur graduati0n cl0thes . . He text me and say it is seri0us ! And i kn0w s0mething was n0t right . . I sense that he want t0 break with me . . And yes ! He did . . . He ask f0r an0ther chance that night . . And i was happy ! Even i feel s0mething was n0t right . . Things went d0wn hill after that . . . We break f0r the sec0nd time . . This time i was even hurt . . . But i f0rgive him . . Maybe he d0esnt bel0ng t0 me . . . But i w0uld still say that i will welc0me y0u because i am still int0 y0u . . But i guess y0u d0nt feel that way anym0re . . .

What i want t0 say is . . Thanks f0r y0ur never ending c0mf0rt . . . I h0pe that y0u find y0ur 0wn happiness and smile . . Y0ur happiness meant a l0t t0 me . . I will be happy f0r y0u . . If y0u ever need a place t0 talk . . I'm here f0r y0u ! D0nt hesitate t0 talk t0 me . . .

Pr0blems that w0man fear .

Y0u fear > when y0u are 0ff t0 dance 0r chatting with friends at the party , he will meet a girl that he likes better than y0u . S0 y0u superglue y0urself t0 him and 0bsess b0ut every girl he talks t0 . This causes him t0 n0tice that y0u d0nt trust him . Y0ur c0nstant s0cial suff0cati0n , nagging and accusati0n c0uld make him s0 fed up that y0ur behavi0ur pushes him int0 the arms 0f an0ther w0man and this situati0n is definitely n0t the 0utc0me y0u're after . ↲Y0u sh0uld > when y0u're at a party , be y0ur 0wn w0man . Give y0ur b0yfriend a peck 0n his cheek and say '' have fun , i'm g0ing t0 circulate ''. Then get 0ut there and d0 just that . Strike up c0nversati0n with new friends . Hang with girlfriends and chat . Make a c0ncerted eff0rt n0t t0 l00k his way 0r check 0ut what he's d0ing . And if a guy y0u d0nt kn0w asks y0u t0 dance , say '' I'd l0ve t0 but I sh0uld let y0u kn0w i'm here with s0me0ne ''(l00k at the place where y0ur bf was and then l00k back t0 talk t0 the stranger). Chances are the stranger will still want t0 gr00ve with y0u anyway , s0 enj0y being flattered and let him flirt with y0u .